ONCE...black Monday ?

It was quite a challenging Mon I must say. Being attacked from the beginning..almost everything I say has to be attacked first before rational kicks-in. Dunno what really hit me...why..? Few people noticed it.

Shared with my boss on the situation and the advice among other things was to bear with it. Increase the threshold, be patience and I will not be left there alone. On one angle, kinda overwhelm with the recognition and acknowledgement on my skills and capabilities to handle such a delicate project. On another angle, kinda sad as I can't pursue the area that I might be able to perform better. For now, need to collect myself back..plan properly and execute accordingly.

And as I'm about to collect myself, I got food poisoning and headache !!! Collapse the whole night and Tue as well. Missed Cradle's open house :( And when everything seems to be alright this morning, something 'bad' happen just 5 minutes before I reached office. Damn !!! Oh well..just bear with it...

ONCE...raya ngan anakanda

Weekend ari tu aku beraya ngan anak2. Terubat rindu selama ni. Cume ada mixed feelings with them. Seronok bila tgk diorang main, gelak2, manja2...tapi sedih bila mengenangkan apa yg dah dipasak dlm pemikiran diorang. Tambah ngan apa yg jadi baru2 ni buatkan aku lebih terusik.

Satu ketika aku tertanya2 kenapa ini semua terjadi...dan aku tertanya2 dimana aku yang dulu. Yang tenang dan sentiasa pasrah dengan keadaan...walaupun ada ketika aku memang tenang, terima seadanya, cume kadang2 aku tertanya2. Aku tak pernah bertanya sebelum ni.

Berat sgt ke dugaan aku kali ni ? Aku tau ada hikmah disebalik setiap ujian dan kejadian...apakah aku telah menjadi lemah ? Tak mungkin ! Kerana ujian yg diturunkan pastinya kerana aku boleh melaluinya...cume apakah jalan yang aku ambil ini yang terbaik ? Hanya Dia yang tahu segala2nya...

ONCE...LIFE

Life is a journey full of ups and downs The downs gave us experiences to move on and up The ups gave us confidence to strive and move further -haizam Sept 2009-

ONCE...satisfied ?

Malam tadi aku bersemuka untuk mendengar sendiri dan meluahkan sendiri supaya masing2 dpt mendengar dari mulut masing2. Alhamdulillah..walaupun tidak semua yang aku hajatkan masa solat hajat lepas maghrib tadi termakbul, tapi yang penting aku tenang, urusan dipermudahkan dan menerima semuanya dengan baik. Perbincangan tersebut juga menemui persetujuan yang harmoni.

Aku pun mulanya agak pelik bagaimana aku boleh setenang itu dalam menerima keputusan tersebut. Tapi aku percaya Allah sentiasa ada bersamaku, berkat doa yang dimakbulkan aku menerima ketenangan dan redha dengan ketentuanNya. Kupohonkan petunjuk dan hidayah dariNya agar aku menemui hikmah yang terselindung disebalik semua ini.

ONCE...shocking news !

Yesterday, I was told about the news. Quite old actually it started a day before Raya. It just arrived to me yesterday. I'm really puzzled on how it turned out that way as the things that was going all along was kinda smooth and good. Keep asking myself why was I being tested this way...like this.

Had a long chat with my brother few hours ago...I realized what I used to tell people to do..and what I used to practice myself which I didn't do it now. I'm supposed to thank Him...syukur with the test given to me. I know that there are blessings in disguise for whatever happen and I need to seek for it. I just forgot to syukur.

So, here I am..."syukur pada Allah kerana memberikan aku ujian ini yang pastinya mempunyai hikmah dan hidayah untuk aku meneruskan hidup ini..walaupun sukar dan pedih namun harus kutabahkan hati dan pasrah serta redha dengan takdir Ilahi"

I hope, I will get a chance to face or confront on this matter so that I know that I've make my effort and leave everything to Him.

ONCE...raya 20092009

Just realized that this year's raya fall on the 20 Sept 2009 (20.09.2009)...such a nice number. Spent time at Kg since late nite yesterday...fair to say about 24 hours ago...only slept after subuh..then woke-up at 9am, go to the market to pick-up the chicken...helped mom out with the chicken and onion and other stuffs for rendang...took a nap from 1pm till 3pm.

Then, cook the nasi himpit...buka puasa...then rendang...then chiffon cake...then the icing...of course the in-between meals...now waiting for my sister...and almost everybody still awake...felt soo good...of course I missed my kids...spoke to Nu'man..my daughter as usual blend into the kg thingy with her young aunts and cousins...anyway, Allah so Great that both Ila & Ira was soo manja with me...

This shall be one of the greatest Raya I've ever had...

ONCE...raya datang lagi..

Ingin mengucapkan Selamat Hari Raya dan Maaf Zahir Batin kepada rakan2 sekalian. Semoga lebaran ini mengungkap seribu keberkatan dan kerahmatan. Selamat beraya didesa, berhati-hati ketika memandu.

ONCE...dugaan Ramadhan

Ramadhan tahun ni pastinya berbeza dari Ramadhan yang lepas2...kali nie aku sahur sorang, buka sorang..terawih pun mostly sorang2. Kadang2 je berbuka dgn kawan2...hasilnya, berat aku turun 5kg hehehe...

Dugaan kali ini agak berlainan...namun aku pasrah...aku redha yang aku perlu usaha lebih untuk mendekatkan diri..tapi Ramadhan kali ini jugak aku dpt get in-touch balik dgn kawan2 yg dah lama aku tak dgr berita...mcm jebat, sahak...dan aku baru sedar betapa keciknya dunia ni dlm dunia siber...aku baru tau ada beberapa kawan yg ada kawan yg sama dgn aku...itulah ketentuan-Nya kan...

Baju raya aku tahun ni simple je...beraya ngan family kt kampung..lambat sikit baru dpt beraya ngan anak2...semoga pasrah menghadapi hari mendatang...

ONCE...tersedar !

Lepas terawih semalam fikiran aku melayang2. Mengenangkan semua yang terjadi lebih2 lagi sepanjang minggu ini. Dengan selesainya 1 Sept ari tu, membuat aku terpikir yg segalanya telah dipermudahkan.

Negotiation on agreement before that, which on that day itself i realized that changes made thus reducing the immediate transfer...then the process on that day itself...and few good news from my good friend.

Syukur Alhamdulillah...and dgn segala kejahilan aku baru teringat yg aku belum buat solat syukur sebab selesai ari tu...apa nak jadilah....apapun, better late than never...

ONCE...baik tau atau tak tau ?

Pagi tadi aku mendapat tahu sesuatu yang agak mencengkam jiwa. Bila difikirkan balik, memang aku jenis yang suka untuk tau daripada tak tau. Walaupun menyakitkan, tapi aku tau dan aku mungkin boleh berbuat sesuatu untuk memperbaiki keadaan yang aku tau tu. Dan setakat ni memang Alhamdulillah, aku memang boleh menangani perkara2 tersebut walau sakit macam mana sekalipun apa yang aku tau tu.

Tapi, apakah tiba masa untuk aku cuba untuk tak tau pulak ? Ke buat tak tau ? Apa impaknya ? Kalu cuba taknak tau...aku mungkin akan tau jugak akhirnya. Kalu buat tak tau, lain pulak jadinya.

So, baik tau ke tak tau ?

ONCE...selesai

Alhamdulillah...pagi tadi dah selesai semuanya. Ermmm...pengesahannye la...nak mendapatkan dokumen2 semua mungkin lagi 4-6 minggu. Cam tak paham gak apa yang lama sangat, tapi ntahlah...camne nak maju.

Apa pun, syukur kehadrat Allah kerana hari ini telah dipermudahkan untuk tujuan ini. Bermula dengan SPN yang berjaya disiapkan pagi tadi sebelum pukul 9 pagi, dan pendengaran keputusan yang berlangsung dengan aman. Alhamdulillah....

ONCE...challenging

It's been a week after I came back. Lots of things happen, good and bad. With ongoing Ramadhan, the challenges has been quite interesting and demanding as well. Is today the most challenging ? Perhaps...based on the scenario of the challenges.

Please God guide me. To all my dear Muslim friends...Selamat Berpuasa.

ONCE...things happen for a reason !

Today, all the delegates arrived from KL. And we were treated for dinner by our partner here at Kiruni Restaurant. Guess what ? It was the restaurant-in-the-jungle that I bumped into on Sat during my exploration in the woods ! Things happen for a reason right ? Just that today, there was no POLAR BEAR mascott :( I had planned to take picture with him as the car turned to where I came out that day...perhaps, he had returned to the Artic as it's too sunny here since Sunday hahahahaha...

ONCE...nice weather

Yesterday was not soo sunny. It rains almost whole day...sky was dark. Rain quite heavy in the afternoon...I managed to go out at 2pm. But today was different ! I woke up at 8am and it was sunny skies. No cloud at all. Had my breakfast, that I'm on my foot at 11am with inner shirt and short-sleeve black t-shirt.

Me at the Rohnidyns'ka vul

When I tested the sun this morning, it's typical summer...the sun doesn't mean a thing. It's windy and quite chilled. But, as I walked..the sun was right above me and I felt some heat. Guess I'll be tanner once I'm back...there goes my plan to be a little bit fairer. Yesterday's was really challenging...was walking in the woods at Khreschatyi Park. I was walking without knowing where does it end...where would I came out. Till I found a building...and near the fence I saw white hairy thing ! Quite big !

Restaurant in the Jungle with Polar Bear

I felt relieved to know that it's a restaurant. Quite exclusive I guess. Then, it took quite a walk to get to Dynamo Stadium. I bummed into an archery post where the guy was shaking his head when I asked him how to go to Dynamo Stadium. He looked at my shoes and gave me the direction. And only today that I noticed that the map does show the route that I took. If only I noticed it earlier. I walked about 3 hours yesterday..about same time on Fri nite and again today.

But, today not so much walking. I spend about 3 hours at the park alone...reading ! I was at the park at Tereschenkivs'ka vul, near T. Shevchenko University. The steets was filled with half a dozen of museums.

Me in-front of T. Shevchenko University

After finishing my book which I bought 4 days ago, I make my way heading back to the hotel. As I glanced at the map, am interested to check out the Museum of Science and Natural History. When I arrived there, I almost resign from going in. The emblem says "National Geological Museum" and another "Institute of Geology"...nothing on science !!! But, what the heck ! Paid 15 uah, and I spent about an hour in there. Quite interesting ! At the Birds section, they preserved lots of birds...and they tag bears the year. Some dated like 1728...but I'm not sure wheather the bird was preserved that old or it was first found that year. Lemme improve the language then perhaps, I get better picture.

Owl at the museum

Mammoth. Other dinasours' bones are available too.

Small aquarium at the Sea section. Beautiful corals isn't it ?

These is supposed to be one picture...dunno how to merge it in Blogger and I'm not good at manipulating pictures. This is the picture of ancient city of Kiev (i guess hahahaha).

Then, I head back to the hotel. The pic below was taken yesterday.

It's the Monument of Independence at Khreschatyk vul. The road was closed during weekends and there's lots of people there. Some showing their dancing skills, some singing, etc. Creative ways to get some money

The best one for me today was this pic...

'Running sign' ? I dunno what it means..seen few of this here.

My Berahims are running out quite fast. The delegates are coming next week. Just now, wanted to do some ironing, so I requested for iron board and iron. Apparently, they don't send you one. There's an ironing room ! And guess what ?! It was besides my room hahahaha. Done with my ironing...wanna take some shower afterwards...and get ready to bed.

Da Svedaniya !

ONCE...not soo summer

It's 22C on a day and about 17C at nite. Yesterday, I walked 3 hours, all the major and minor roads...based on the map collected at the hotel. Regained my cyrillic which i planned to polish while i'm here.

I planned to go to the park today...spend some time reading...then look for some souveniers before head back to the hotel. Will be spending the nite in the hotel reading and polishing.

Had quite interesting experiences yesterday. In here, you might find money wrapped in plastic bag on the street. But, don't you ever...ever take it !!! Even if you see that it's dropped from the guy in-front of you. It's a scam ! If you take, and tried to return it to the guy, he will say there's another package and accused you of taking it. Then, a cop (his friend actually) will appear and they will start talking and you don't understand a word...the cop will asked for you passport and wallet...and they will take whatever in your wallet (since of course, you don't want the hassle to go to the police station in this foreign country).

It does happen to me that way yesterday. Someone suddenly walked besides me...then with a surprised expression, he collected the money. I just walked like no body's business and after a while i looked back. Nothing happen to him ! It happened twice. Either these guys are really lucky to walk away with those money...or they're part of it.

Another one, this guy talked to me and I only managed to pick-up "..cigarette..". So, I said I don't understand but here you go. You know what ? He repeated himself in English (that time he has held the cigarette and i'm ready to light it up for him). I said "it's fine..you can take it...". Then I get my ass out of there...

Well...hungry...makan time !!!

ONCE...demanding ?

Am I too demanding ? Was it too hard to understand what I want, what I feel and what I expect ? Or has I turned to be a person that is too demanding...sometimes unnecessary and even unthinkable that I don't even believe myself behaving like that.

Hmmmmmm.................

ONCE...Auny's Birthday

Last sat was Auny's birthday. I brought them to watch Ice Age 3...they loved it soo much. Then, have some Baskin Robbin and head to Popular to find her birthday present. I wanted to give her a book that she wants.

She said she wanted to be a scientist (must be the microscope that I bought her last month). When I asked her why...as usual 'Don't know !' was her answer. I thought, never mind...if she wants to be a scientist, I'll guide her to be one. Then we looked for a science related book...quite heavy though the books that I found...even it's pictorial but would blow the interest. So, I bought one that is quite simple...and told her to read thru then by next week we'll discuss.

Well...had great time with them...until late afternoon when she bombarded me with so many questions. Hmmm....

ONCE...9th July 2009 !!!

That day suppose to be D-Day ! Took 2 days leave (but the other half-day considered gone as I went to this tender briefing). That day, went smooth initially...as decision about to be made..in fact, it has been concluded, decision has been reached..just waiting for the announcement.

As the honorable person started his opening for the decision, this one person interrupted. Made the honorable person annoyed and postponed the decision. WTF ?!!! I'm really speechless at that time. I just want to get it over with so that it's clear for both parties.

I prayed the night before and on that morning so that everything went smooth. I thanked God as the decision about to be announced...guess He wants me to be patience a little bit longer...

ONCE...finally ?

I received the notice today...Insya-Allah next mon will be official and final.  I must say I'm shocked to see the 'demand'.  Took me a while before I can calm down myself.  In the afternoon, received a message that those are just standard and we shall discuss on mon peacefully.  Am glad...I hope everything would be in peace and harmony.

ONCE...English as compulsary subject for SPM ?

This is the latest news that is debated extensively among the academicians, policy makers, politicians and citizens.  It is really delicate to me.  The comments from some people also make me wanna puke.

Why they have to use '...students environment especially rural areas, estate will make it harder for them to learn english..the environment does not support...'.  What the heck man ?!!!  I believed they should think further on how to create the environment in those areas.  Perhaps, few NGOs or voluntary groups can go to those areas and coach or guide the students and perhaps the community at that area as well.  Govt should allocate some funds for such activities be it via govt agencies or funds for NGOs to do their work.

Witholding such decision will only held the country back.  We're already lacking and behind time in meeting the Vision 2020 (developed country), now we wanna slow down ?  We need to think more on how to resolve and mitigate the potential problems and not stalling the progress by stopping good initiatives.